Lyrics for Greg Long's In the Waiting

Pain
The gift nobody longs for, still it comes
And somehow leaves us stronger
When it's gone away

Pray
I try and pray for Your will to be done
But I confess it's never fast enough for me

It seems
the hardest part is waiting on You
When what I really want
Is just to see Your hand move

I want a peace beyond my understanding
I want to feel it fall like rain
In the middle of my hurting
I want to feel Your arms as they surround me
And let me know that it's okay
To be here in this place
Resting in the peace that only comes
In the waiting

Time
Time to let it go and just believe
Trusting in what no one else but You can see

Free
Freedom from the fears that close me in
When I can't get beyond where I have been, but then

Again
The silence doesn't mean that I'm alone
As long as I can hear
That I am still Your own

I want a peace beyond my understanding
I want to feel it fall like rain
In the middle of my hurting
I want to feel Your arms as they surround me
And let me know that it's okay
To be here in this place
Resting in the peace that only comes
In the waiting

Home

It’s times like these that my heart yearns to be home. My head knows that I wouldn’t last there, but when so many things seem to be bad there, while I know I couldn’t fix it, the desire to wrap my arms around them and share the pain is overwhelming.

The phone just feels so cold and uncaring.

Our Own

So the US has once again engaged in being the world police. Don’t get me wrong, I do not support the likes of Gadhafi, but at what point do we stop stretching ourselves? We have troops deployed all over the world to help others, but when do we start taking care of our own citizens?

When will our government spend their minds and money to shelter the homeless, feed the poor, protect the abused and educate the less fortunate? I’m not looking for handouts for folks, but rather support programs worth seeking. Our social service programs are poorly funded. How are they to effectively transform the lives of those they touch? No, it isn’t all about money, but it is about priorities and our country doesn’t have theirs in order.

I understand that we are very influential at the world’s table because we’re involved in the world’s issues. I know those who serve our country allow us to keep the freedoms we enjoy each day and allow me to sit here and convey my thoughts without fear of retaliation. I honestly do comprehend and enjoy it.

I will continue to support our troops for their willingness to give their lives for others and I hope you will too.

I simply want to know when we will start taking care of our own?

Heavy Heart

It was a rough work week, but not in the way most people will assume. There were multiple heart to heart conversations had between myself and other folks. Most ended well, but a few ended badly and I wish I knew how to meet those folks where they're at and fix it or convey what it is that needs to be done to make it right.

I made the statement many times this past week that the most difficult part of being a leader isn't the work, but the emotional impact you take. Everything can go right and the numbers turn out great, but when your folks aren't happy, when morale is down or you have to end the relationship between the company and an associate, it weighs on you, or at least it does me. It's like an anvil around my heart and I can feel the beat in my calves.

Interviews were conducted and finished this week, and while an offer has yet to be made, I'm already concerned about how those who were not chosen will react to the news. We had great candidates and trying to figure out who to choose was difficult. It could have been any one of half the folks interviewed and it would have still been a win for the team. I want to be able to convey that when we sit with folks, but will it come across? Will our feedback do them justice? Will they give up on us?

I have a heavy heart right now and as often as I try to give it up, I seem to have kept a string attached to my wrist so that I can pull it right back down to me.

I need the scissors.

Thoughts...

The past few weeks have been interesting and have left me with some things on my mind.

•   I am more grateful than ever at how the Lord has blessed me, especially as I feel that I have caused Him to continuously bend down and pick me up on a daily basis. Relationships are hard and I’m not sure that I’ll ever get this one right.
•  Five years ago yesterday I went on my second date with Ray and knew that I would marry him as I left the restaurant that night. I never thought I’d marry until that night. He means the world to me. He keeps me grounded, laughing and loving. And probably out of a psych ward.
• Health scares me. Or maybe I should say the lack their of? I went to the doctor last week and it was a sobering experience. Have you ever been told that you can’t or shouldn’t do something that you never planned on doing and now that you can’t/shouldn’t you’re mad about it? Or how about, “If you continue on this track in 5 years you’ll (insert unpleasant ending here).” I’ll summarize by stating it was a visit that left me a bit depressed, yet thoughtful.
• It’s March and we’ll make our last payment on our only debt! Holy smokes! I know some believe Dave Ramsey is a bit strict, but the Lord worked through him to get The Mancil’s financials where they should have been all along. The stress of “what if” isn’t as heavy and I know without a doubt that we have and are doing the right things concerning our finances.
• Speaking of debt, why do states have to balance their budgets, but the federal government doesn’t? How did we afford to give $1 billion to Haiti just a week ago? By no means am I saying they do not need help, but how does a country that is trillions of dollars in debt give $1 billion in aide to another country? Where did it come from?
• Why is our tax code so confusing that I can take my paperwork to three different people and get three different results? I’m game for a flat tax.
• Gas prices, Libya: Gadhafi vs. Rebels...It’s probably best that I stop while I’m ahead here.
• With everything that’s going on in the world, do we really need 24/7 coverage of Charlie Sheen?
• We vote for a President in 20 months. Hope to see you at the polls.
• Why do public workers need unions? And how do publicly elected officials who are paid by the tax payers think it’s okay to walk away from their state and jobs in protest. Get back to work. If you don’t get what you want, then keep fighting the political battle the way it was meant to be fought. This isn’t the toddler soccer team where everyone wins a trophy at the end of the season.
• U.S. Rep. Pete King’s hearing entitled “The Extent of Radicalization in the American Muslim Community and that Community’s Response” and the possible implications and the way the hearings have been framed = Irresponsible.

Do you have anything on your mind?